Consultant Physician and Chief Executive Officer of the Accra London Health Centre, Dr Vanessa Apea, says women are naturally drawn to power, confidence and the sense of security that influence provides.
She was speaking on JoyPrime’s Let’s Talk while weighing in on a discussion about a woman who engaged in sexual relations with a man of God following a private counselling session.
Appearing alongside Counsellor and Resident Pastor of the Universal Gospel Centre, Rev Daniel Annan, Dr Apea attributed such occurrences to what she described as the magnetic pull of power and authority figures.
According to Dr Apea, the attraction women often feel towards men in positions of authority is deeply psychological. “We are drawn to power, we’re drawn to confidence. Power comes with influence and influence can give you that security that you may have always wanted,” she stated.
Drawing parallels beyond religious leadership, she pointed to professions such as the military and emergency services, where uniforms symbolise desirable traits including protection, structure, focus, confidence and dedication. She noted that women are often attracted to these qualities and, by extension, professionals in those fields.
“Many women love men in the army. The uniform represents structure, focus, confidence and dedication, so then you assume that the person in those garments also has a personality to match that,” she said.
Dr Apea explained that people, particularly women, who perceive someone as a figure of authority, safety and trust are more likely to comply with that person’s demands, including acts that may be abusive to themselves. She said this dynamic accounts for the majority of sexual abuse cases involving religious leaders and congregants or women.
Referencing the story under discussion, she advised couples to forgive themselves and heal from guilt when they falter against their spouse, while allowing their partners adequate time to process and recover as well. She noted that guilt is a powerful emotion which, if not properly addressed, can escalate into unresolved issues.
“Guilt is a natural emotion, guilt manifests in different ways in different people but the most important thing is what you do with that guilt. Guilt eats you up, it’s true, so you have to deal with it thoroughly else it stays in your mind and ruins you.”
She also urged women to recognise their own autonomy and inner strength to overcome abusive situations and to make effective use of that power, so they are not taken advantage of.
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